The Next Big Movie (Fake movie (SaltyLakeXD))
About the Author
More By SaltylakeXD
NOTE: This is a fake movie I made for the laughs. Please don't take it seriously.
The Next Big Movie is a 2020 live action/animated black comedy film directed by David Failsburg and Darry McBedwetter. It was supposed to be released in 2017, but spent the next 3 years in development hell because the budget ran out before the film was completed. It is the sequel to DUH WORST MUVIE EVAH!!!!!!!!!11 The film premiered at an abandoned school on June 30, 2020.
Why It Sucks
- This film wasn't screened in advance for critics, which... FUCK IT, YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS!
- The plot is unoriginal and it feels like your average cheap kid's flick with unfunny juvenile humour added in.
- Awful acting.
- The scenes that are supposed to be funny, serious, or sad are ruined by the horrible acting.
- Unlikeable characters such as Johnny, Caitlin, Brooke, Porky Minch, Bowser, Wario, Waluigi, the Paul Brothers, SaltylakeXD's clone, EijiZeBoi's clone, Mr. Dready's clone, FRED, Adolf Hitler, Fred Durst and Rob.
- TOO MANY POP CULTURE REFERENCES! Over half of them were already outdated by the time the film was released!
- ABYSMAL acting from the live-action characters.
- Multiple out of place cameos, especially for Mike Shinoda, Jonathan Davis, Amy Lee, Brent Smith, Melanie Martinez, Billie Eilish, Plainrock124, Jojo Siwa, Misha Silenosti, etc.
- Abysmal special effects. The blood is clearly coloured water and the dismembered body parts are clearly fake Halloween decorations or CGI.
- Speaking of the CGI, it looks like it was taken straight from a 90s CD-ROM computer game!
- It runs for 96 minutes, which is just 69 backwards.
- Blatant product placement.
- There is a scene where SaltylakeXD's clone COMMITS BLASPHEMY AGAINST GRETA THUNBERG!!!!!!!!!! SHE MUST GO TO KIKO HELL FOR WHAT SHE'S DONE!!!!!!
- What's worse is that there is a scene where EijiZeBoi's clone walks into The Church of Greta and TELLS ALL OF THE MEMBERS TO GO TO KIKO HELL!!!!!!!!!
- Overuse of the "-kiko" insult. What is that even supposed to mean!?
- Some characters have ridiculous/laughable names, such as Assfuck, Mike Hawk, and Ben Dover.
- In one scene, BOWSER SAYS THE N-WORD!!!
- The scene where Ben Dover RAPES SALTYLAKEXD IN ANOTHER DIMENSION!!!!!!